Two years of revolution for evolution
Changing your self, leaving behind the hard bound attitudes and accepting the truth about yourselves isn’t that easy. There were days when I thought “I wish I could be a little taller”, “How I wish I could be a little fairer”’ “Damn, I should have been a sportsman and not fiddling with this computers”. Sure there were reasons behind every thought that shadowed my present.
Describing the kind of person I was in simple words “short (5.1”), dark, built like a barrel (my friends used to mock me, “bro, why rolling down the street when you can walk”), and I was always ready to let loose the positive things in me and grasp the negative impacts things had on me.
People were ready to mock me, let that be my college or my church, everywhere the same, at times I felt like God was having his part too in this jumble.
School days over, I thought. Now ‘m getting into a college, a great institution where religion played an important part. I was very proud the first day I entered the college, big campus which I have never seen in my life, those vintage structures, mixture of old and new cultures, those foreign nationalities… they were new to me. And I started liking it. When people asked me, “What are you doing” I used to proudly answer them “’m doing my graduation in English in _______college”. And what I heard next from many was “yeah Christians easily find a place there”, people failed to recognize my talents, that easily put me off easily, again and again and again. It ravaged my brains, squandered my thoughts ultimately I became a “Mr. Nobody”.
Three good years rolled, followed by one more year. That one more year almost changed my moving track completely, my life changed, and I felt better and my best.
I owe a million to those who helped in those days. The encouragement and love that I received in those days were the corner stone for my building up into a better person.
MCC
After then I landed in this wonderful place which was my dream for years. I fell in love with this campus the very first day I saw. I have always had a irk feeling when people were happy about their falling in love, I used to think, “poor thing, he hasn’t realized that he has fallen, damn till this day you were standing but now you are down, shake off the dust and stand on your knees” I never liked that word, “falling”. Something has changed, now even I have started liking that word “falling, fell, fall”, yeah I fell in love with the campus. And the best part, I enjoyed that fall.
Life in Madras Christian College is smooth, without any speed breakers, they are so even that when it comes to face a uneven situation two things happen, I guess it suits for every MCCian, “they learn to face that situation”, “They remain super cool the next time they face it”. I guess those things are installed in me too. Its upto you how genuine the “cool” pack you get. Some get the wrong files and become irresponsible, but the pack of virus makes them feel that they have crossed the super cool stage and now into superlative cool stage. You learn a lot in your stay in the campus. Heavenly lot of things you get inspired.
My friends and my profs are the best installed packages in my stay in that college. They have run in me some of the best lessons that I wouldn’t have learnt outside. They have taught me “how to respect the men next to you, how not to respect the men next to you”, “they have taught me how to work and how not to work”. Here I should bring in the example of my friends different approaches and ways of completing the work.
DINESH, the damn cool guy, will finish his work whatsoever may come in between; you can see a paradigm shift literally while he works and otherwise. He becomes so serious that I would stand strangled , then gathering all the might left within, make a slow approach, not too fast and not too slow. Any clarification at that time should be feather light. But the guy is sweet, and much sharper. I haven’t met anybody in life like him whose approach to things are totally unique. I owe him a lot. Love you machi
KRISHNA, the guy is sharp and witty, he is known to finish the work on time. He will go to any extend to finish his work. He stays fully focused till the work is done and the best part is even after its done. The guy is a love doctor. The best thing I learnt from his is say “no” when you really have to and talk out your opinion boldly if it has to be. He has also taught me to carry out things with ease and craft it carefully before executing it.
ANDY BOY the cool dude of the department who never says “I Quit” even if its above the his ability. The guy explodes with self confidence and never accepts defeat with ease. You should watch his dramatic courage live, those don’t really have words to describe. The best chapter in him is, the guy is such sweet heart. You can trust him at any time and at any hour. He can work continuously round the clock. His love for people is genuine.
I can testify about them since I have seen them in action and have been with them.
The class is full of 28 different attitude, which at time clash bringing in sparks but that does not last longer, the guys are always ready to put off the heat.
I witnessed a lot of things in this two year stay, learnt a lot, heard statements like “Fenn, you are what I thought you are, you have changed a lot da”.
The efforts I took to change my self and bring out the attitude and character were immense. I started realizing the situations I go through, opened my eyes wide enough to understand the play in and around me.
I started to work out in gym to build my physical self. I grew strong, with big biceps and deep cut triceps, broad shoulders and wide chest. Then I realized my inner self needs attention, I did started working out on that, and tried to harden my emotions to the extend that it started to make people blurt immediately “Fenn you have a changed, Fenn why did you hide your self all these days, Fenn, Fen, Fenn”
I have changed a lot, I do realize, positive and negative. Now I think (trrrrrrr*…), I talk, life has changed a million ton. Now when I turn back to look the path I walked through these two years, I am happy and glad. Though in the play I have to be stabbed, till the moment of stab, God was gracious enough to hold me all the way through.
I owe a lot to all my friends who have shaped me up all these days. I pray to God that I should be able share my blessings with them. They are unique and precious. They sure are an asset to those who get them.
I Love You Guys
Changing your self, leaving behind the hard bound attitudes and accepting the truth about yourselves isn’t that easy. There were days when I thought “I wish I could be a little taller”, “How I wish I could be a little fairer”’ “Damn, I should have been a sportsman and not fiddling with this computers”. Sure there were reasons behind every thought that shadowed my present.
Describing the kind of person I was in simple words “short (5.1”), dark, built like a barrel (my friends used to mock me, “bro, why rolling down the street when you can walk”), and I was always ready to let loose the positive things in me and grasp the negative impacts things had on me.
People were ready to mock me, let that be my college or my church, everywhere the same, at times I felt like God was having his part too in this jumble.
School days over, I thought. Now ‘m getting into a college, a great institution where religion played an important part. I was very proud the first day I entered the college, big campus which I have never seen in my life, those vintage structures, mixture of old and new cultures, those foreign nationalities… they were new to me. And I started liking it. When people asked me, “What are you doing” I used to proudly answer them “’m doing my graduation in English in _______college”. And what I heard next from many was “yeah Christians easily find a place there”, people failed to recognize my talents, that easily put me off easily, again and again and again. It ravaged my brains, squandered my thoughts ultimately I became a “Mr. Nobody”.
Three good years rolled, followed by one more year. That one more year almost changed my moving track completely, my life changed, and I felt better and my best.
I owe a million to those who helped in those days. The encouragement and love that I received in those days were the corner stone for my building up into a better person.
MCC
After then I landed in this wonderful place which was my dream for years. I fell in love with this campus the very first day I saw. I have always had a irk feeling when people were happy about their falling in love, I used to think, “poor thing, he hasn’t realized that he has fallen, damn till this day you were standing but now you are down, shake off the dust and stand on your knees” I never liked that word, “falling”. Something has changed, now even I have started liking that word “falling, fell, fall”, yeah I fell in love with the campus. And the best part, I enjoyed that fall.
Life in Madras Christian College is smooth, without any speed breakers, they are so even that when it comes to face a uneven situation two things happen, I guess it suits for every MCCian, “they learn to face that situation”, “They remain super cool the next time they face it”. I guess those things are installed in me too. Its upto you how genuine the “cool” pack you get. Some get the wrong files and become irresponsible, but the pack of virus makes them feel that they have crossed the super cool stage and now into superlative cool stage. You learn a lot in your stay in the campus. Heavenly lot of things you get inspired.
My friends and my profs are the best installed packages in my stay in that college. They have run in me some of the best lessons that I wouldn’t have learnt outside. They have taught me “how to respect the men next to you, how not to respect the men next to you”, “they have taught me how to work and how not to work”. Here I should bring in the example of my friends different approaches and ways of completing the work.
DINESH, the damn cool guy, will finish his work whatsoever may come in between; you can see a paradigm shift literally while he works and otherwise. He becomes so serious that I would stand strangled , then gathering all the might left within, make a slow approach, not too fast and not too slow. Any clarification at that time should be feather light. But the guy is sweet, and much sharper. I haven’t met anybody in life like him whose approach to things are totally unique. I owe him a lot. Love you machi
KRISHNA, the guy is sharp and witty, he is known to finish the work on time. He will go to any extend to finish his work. He stays fully focused till the work is done and the best part is even after its done. The guy is a love doctor. The best thing I learnt from his is say “no” when you really have to and talk out your opinion boldly if it has to be. He has also taught me to carry out things with ease and craft it carefully before executing it.
ANDY BOY the cool dude of the department who never says “I Quit” even if its above the his ability. The guy explodes with self confidence and never accepts defeat with ease. You should watch his dramatic courage live, those don’t really have words to describe. The best chapter in him is, the guy is such sweet heart. You can trust him at any time and at any hour. He can work continuously round the clock. His love for people is genuine.
I can testify about them since I have seen them in action and have been with them.
The class is full of 28 different attitude, which at time clash bringing in sparks but that does not last longer, the guys are always ready to put off the heat.
I witnessed a lot of things in this two year stay, learnt a lot, heard statements like “Fenn, you are what I thought you are, you have changed a lot da”.
The efforts I took to change my self and bring out the attitude and character were immense. I started realizing the situations I go through, opened my eyes wide enough to understand the play in and around me.
I started to work out in gym to build my physical self. I grew strong, with big biceps and deep cut triceps, broad shoulders and wide chest. Then I realized my inner self needs attention, I did started working out on that, and tried to harden my emotions to the extend that it started to make people blurt immediately “Fenn you have a changed, Fenn why did you hide your self all these days, Fenn, Fen, Fenn”
I have changed a lot, I do realize, positive and negative. Now I think (trrrrrrr*…), I talk, life has changed a million ton. Now when I turn back to look the path I walked through these two years, I am happy and glad. Though in the play I have to be stabbed, till the moment of stab, God was gracious enough to hold me all the way through.
I owe a lot to all my friends who have shaped me up all these days. I pray to God that I should be able share my blessings with them. They are unique and precious. They sure are an asset to those who get them.
I Love You Guys
5 comments:
machan, what more to say da...m.c.c rocks and so do you! i jus want to say tht you are fine as u are da...ppl will always talk, if u listen then u will be screwed mentally....only now u can be free and unique....be fenn...a trailblazer!
nice write up. wish u a very bright future. v ill miss coll 4sure. those were the best days dude.
thankyou sarah, i guess i lost my original self trying to please people, now 'm slowly trying to be my self...
yeah its hard to hear people say, "i never expected from this fenn", and that makes you feel like you done some crime...
but 'm slowly coming up
God alone is my strength
will miss you macha
andy macha, you are also blessed person da...
I thank God at this time for the wonderful friends he have given me...
I love you machi
hey u write gud emotional stuff.. have felt and keep feeling this"stop trying to please someone else and be urself" many times and have been learning to live life on my own terms than those dictated by others..... all the best in your career....ur attitude rocks dude...
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